Recently, at a softball game, a bleacher neighbor said to his wife "Hey did you hear? Heidi's family is going to London...virtually free."
"Virtually" is the key word here.
Since we are leaving on our "virtually free" trip soon, it only stands to reason that we had to replace our garage door and pay 325 dollars for van repairs last week. Neither of which was free - virtually or otherwise.
It also stands to reason that Paul and I are starting to receive strict instructions from our offspring on how we are expected to behave on this trip.
"I don't want to look like a bunch of tacky tourists," Kayla keeps reminding us, with a stern look in her eye.
What she's really saying is "You BETTER not embarrass me over there."
I say she's survived extreme embarrassment at our hands countless times on American soil; it's time to toughen her up and start embarrassing her on another continent.
After all, we want her to be well rounded.
Plus, it's like she's laying down a challenge for us.
Our number one rule is not to walk around with our cameras hanging from our neck.
I also don't think she likes my Easy Spirit Walk/Run shoes that I plan to wear much of the time.
(I think I'll pair them with Bermudas and red crew socks.)
Paul is not to drool over the maps of the subway routes like he did in Boston. Paul really likes maps.
He is not, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, to pick up a British accent, as he is prone to do after spending any time with a British co-worker.
I also think wearing dark socks with his white running shoes is a no-no; as is wearing white socks with brown dress shoes and plaid shorts.
Oh! and he is not to ask for Ranch dressing at every restaurant regardless of whether or not he has a salad.
I'm sure we will receive more intense instructions on the flight over, with the pressure building as we get close to landing.
Say it again. What are you forbidden to do? REPEAT!
I don't know! I don't know! Stop! Stop! I can't stand it another minute!!
So here is my promise to our sweet daughter:
I promise to embarrass you no more and no less in England than I ever do in America.
Take that how you will.
2 comments:
Just so long as you don't get stuck on the rotary going around and around and pointing out the window, "Look Kids! Big Ben, Parliament!"
(Remember that from Nat'l Lampoons European Vacation?? It's about the only thing I do remember!!)
Also, might I suggest, taping the bridge of your glasses. ALWAYS a stunning look. :)
But if you don't embarrass her at least a little, you'll be letting all of us moms who are "doing our part" down.
Psst - Come see what I have for you.
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