THIS I PROMISE YOU

Dear Blake and Kayla,
As you become young adults, I am sure you have tuned in to enough adult conversations to pick up on some of the issues I've had with my parents. Perhaps you have picked up on the painful childhood I had. I have never seen the need to share my painful past, but I will never lie to you. I might, perhaps, put off answering questions until I think you are old enough to see the whole picture.
Because of my childhood, I hope to model two things to you as you choose your paths in life.
First, I hope to model a life of forgiveness. I am not perfect at this, but I have learned a lot in my nearly 40 years on earth. Sometimes you will have a heavy load to carry as you face adulthood. Forgiveness lightens that load. Learn now to forgive the small things and it will be easier to forgive the larger things later on.

Second, I hope to model a life of "no excuses." A bad break early in life is not an excuse to behave badly later in life. Hopefully, your dad and I will spare you from any of these bad breaks, but we can't predict what life has in store for us. If you have a setback, mourn or grieve or get angry; but then pick yourself up and learn from it, and move on. Use that setback to make your life better and to improve the lives of others.

And now, I promise you two things.
I promise you that, as long as we are on this earth together, your dad and I will be partners. Before we got married, we looked at each other and promised that divorce was not an option. You can always count on us being a unit. When you choose one, you choose the other. Together we will raise you. Together we will discipline you. Together we will rejoice over your successes. Together we will watch you make mistakes. Together we will decide when to lift you up and carry you and when to let you pick yourself up and brush yourself off. Together we will lay awake at night and watch the clock when you start to date. Together we will mark each milestone in your life - graduation, college, marriage, new babies. Each of you has caught us kissing in the kitchen and dancing in the dining room. I promise that you will have many memories like that. It is our job to be partners for you. It is your job, at this young stage in life, to take for granted the fact that we will always be there as a unit. Because we will.

I promise you that, no matter what, I will never choose to be removed from your life. From the day you were born, I knew it was my job to raise you and let you go out into the world. But even when that day comes, I will never remove myself from your life. I will watch you go off to college. I will watch you make a home and family with your spouse. But I will be there. There will be disagreements, but none will ever be bad enough to make me turn my back on you. As long as I am on this earth, I will love the sound of your voice. I will crave the sound of your laughter and I will look forward to every bit of news you are willing to share with me. As long as I am on this earth, I will hurt when you hurt, and I will enjoy what you enjoy.

This I promise you.