LUCY AND RICKY TAKE A WALK.....

The Don took today off so he could drive The Princess and a friend to Chicago to watch The Bandits play. The Bandits are a women's softball team and Jennie Finch often pitches for them. Do you know who Jennie Finch is? She's the young woman who pitched for the 2004 U.S Women's softball team when they won their gold medal in the summer Olympics. The Princess LOVES Jennie Finch. She took her Finch jersey and a sharpie in hopes of getting an autograph. Let's all keep our fingers crossed shall we...

Anyway, since they didn't leave until around 1:00, The Don was home to take a walk with me this morning. I have been walking at the mall each morning because the weather is wicked hot outside. So we pull up at the mall and park the jeep and walk about 3 feet and The Don says
"This isn't good." When I turn to look at him I see he's holding the clicker up that he'd slipped in his pocket so he could unlock the jeep after our walk, without carrying his whole keyring.

Except he was holding the clicker to the van.

And my keys were in my purse locked in the jeep because as we parked I had said "I'm just going to keep all of my keys and stuff in the car since you'll have everything we need, right?"

So before we decided how to handle this situation I said (in all loving, submissive kindness and understanding) "you know, I walk here nearly every morning without incident, and the day I bring you, my walk goes into the crapper...." And he said "I know." And then I couldn't stop laughing. And neither could he.

We decided, as we walked the mall, that we had several options. Here were the main two:

1. Walk home and wake the Princess up so she could let us in once we got to the house. Because we had done such a good job of locking her in the house when we left, we had no way of re-entering once we got to our front porch.
2. Call The Smart One at his friend Drew's house, where he had spent the night, and wake him up and tell him to come unlock the jeep at the mall for us.

We weighed our options carefully. Both seemed risky since they each involved waking a teenager. Who should we tick off today? The Princess....? The Smart One...?

The Smart One was the winner!!! Yay, Smart One!!

So The Don called our son. I think the conversation went something like this:

Dad: uh, yeah, I need you to come to the mall in the next half hour and unlock the jeep. I locked the keys in it when I parked for our walk.

Son: You're kidding me?! Why can't you get mom to do it?

Dad: Because your mom is here with me stuck at the mall...

Son: alriiiiiiiiiight.

When they hung up The Don said "Well, he's mad."
And I said "He probably hung up, looked at Drew and said 'I'll never get them raised.'"

So as we continued our walk The Don said "We need to change..." and I didn't let him finish because I said "WE don't need to change anything, YOU need to change your habit of locking the keys in the car." And he said "I need you to change how we do things..."

Wait, what? He needs me to change how we do things when it comes to locking the car?

So he said "yeah, if you would stop locking the car from your side when we get out of it, I'd know I need to lock it with the keys and then I'd be sure to have the keys in my hand."

So I said "nuh-uh!! If I didn't lock it from my side I'd ask if you'd locked the car and you'd say 'it'll be ok unlocked.' or you'd lock it from your side without the keys and still leave your keys in the car. And besides that, now when we leave the car I not only have to ask if you have the keys, I also have to ask if they are the right keys. AAAAANNNND.... if you hadn't tried so hard to simplify things by only carrying the clicker, we'd not be locked out. You've simplified us right into being trapped at the mall...."

Yeah, I'm really good at letting things go like that....

Oh, and before we left the jeep, we each grabbed a couple of dollars - for coffee for him and water for me. So we walk into the coffee shop and, like a couple of 5-year-olds say, "Um, yeah, how much is a small coffee, cause we only have a couple of dollars?" And I say "ooooh, next time, I'm bringing in more money so I can afford a fresh fruit smoothie. But for now, could I just have a bottled water, please?"And the young clerk was trying to be patient with us so I said "We've locked ourselves out of our car, or we'd have more money to get exactly what we wanted...."

So we finished our walk and then went to Lowe's to buy a dishwasher. And as they ring it up guess what The Don says? "Honey, I need your credit card. I left my wallet in the jeep."
I AM NOT KIDDING!!!!

Then The Don's phone rings:

Dad: Hellooooooo?

Daughter: Um, Dad. The Smart One wants me to ask you if you'll bring lunch home from Panda Express.

Dad: (sigh) Yes.

When they hung up, he said "The kids want Chinese food. How can I tell them no after making him rescue us like that?"

Yep. They'll probably never get us raised.