OPRAH'S FAVORITE THINGS

Kayla and I watched Oprah's Favorite Things Giveaway yesterday.

Before I go on, let me just say; I like Oprah. She went through her tabloid Jerry Springer-like period; she went through her New Age type phase - and I didn't care for either one of those styles. But all in all I like her because I think she's generous. Really generous.

And the neat thing about this episode was that the audience was filled with people who worked for charitable organizations, so obviously she likes to reward generosity. Go Oprah.

Anyway, we were watching the Favorite Things Giveaway and really admiring the gifts we saw her give away:

a fancy camera
cashmere sweater and throw
a cruise (YOU'RE. ALL. GOING. ON. A. CRUISE!!!)
the edge brownie pan (totally want that)
warm up clothes and Nikes
a really fancy television with 3D glasses
some diamond jewelry

Wow, really neat stuff.

But the best part of the whole show? The part that was even better than the presents?

The audience reactions.

I think it's safe to say that dignity and reserve are checked at the door when you enter the Oprah Favorite Things Giveaway dreamland.

I'm not saying I'd act any differently - but sweet mercy - these people were funny.

Oprah even had EMTs on hand in case someone needed medical treatment after receiving her new sweater.

There was hugging. There was kissing. And, no, I do not assume those doing the hugging and kissing knew each other - they were just overtaken by euphoria.

New Nikes!! OH MY GOSH!! I'm going to kiss this stranger.

I'm fairly certain I would just stand frozen to the floor doing the ugly cry if I was one of those lucky audience members, but you never know.

Perhaps I'd be like the woman who pounded herself in the forehead several times with both fists after seeing one of the gifts. She looked as though she was either having a stroke (thus the need for EMTs) or cramming for a chemistry final and could not remember the chemical formula for table salt.

Poor thing.

I do know that there were lots of Christians in the audience.

There must have been because I saw lots of hands reaching to Heaven and mouths that appeared to be saying "Thank You Jesus!!"

Because we all know that Jesus is never nearer than at that one moment when we receive a new brownie pan (WHERE ALL THE BROWNIES HAVE AN EDGE!!!)

It is my guess that these lucky audience members not only had all their material yearnings met during this episode; they also had a deep spiritual experience.

I think it is also safe to say that Kayla and I will be parked in front of the television again on Monday.

The Favorite Things Episode is two parts this year.

Call 911.