I just made a quick trip to Wal-Mart to pick up a few things for Kayla's party tonight. I pushed my cart through the store with a mental scream going through my head the entire time. I simply am not used to shopping on Saturday when everybody else is out shopping. And I do mean EVERYBODY else.
When my kids were babies, I stuck to a routine most of the time. Since they were early risers - usually up by 6 in the morning - I would have them fed and dressed by 8 and that is when I ran my errands. Because the babies were full and rested and we'd be home in time for a 10:00 nap. I somehow never got out of that habit. Even as they have reached the teen and preteen years and they sleep late and can be left home alone, I have still felt compelled to get my errands done first thing each day.
Well, I can't do that now that I'm working. Yes, I go in at 10:00 but I can't get groceries on my way to work because they'd have to sit in the car for 4 hours. And I can't always get them after work because there is usually a car pool to drive or some pick-up or drop-off to tend to. I usually hit the ground running when I get home at 2:15. Before I started working, if the kids asked to go to Wal-Mart on a Saturday, I'd say "We do not go to Wal-Mart on Saturday because I can go through the day during the week and avoid the crowd." Now, I am thinking I may have to join the Saturday Wal-Mart madness. I did it today and I did not handle it well. I just kept thinking one thing - "AAAAAAAARGGHHHH!!!"
Judging by our son's schedule for football ( and his academic load), and our daughter's jr. high schedule, I am not going to have many free evenings. So I am going to adjust my attitude and get used to the Saturday Wal-Mart madness. Perhaps if I go earlier from now on. But until I get used to it, I would be very appreciative if the rest of you would just stay out of Wal-Mart on Saturday. I'll let you know when you can come back.
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I have felt the last couple weeks as though I am just preparing for something to happen, but I didn't know what it was. I wonder if this is how a sky diver feels before leaping the first time. I have now realized what I'm bracing myself for - my son growing up and moving on. I know, I know. It sounds melodramatic. But I feel as though I am getting ready to leap out of a plane, and once my feet leave the solid floor boards, there is no turning back. I have four years left with him at home. FOUR YEARS. You parents know how quickly that will go. He told Paul today that this would really be his last time to have to drive carpool because for baseball in the spring he can walk to the field. And next year he will have his license before football starts. Yes. Next year he will have his license before football starts. How did this happen? How did our lives suddenly become stuck in fast forward? AND, the other night on our walk Paul said "Six years, Heidi...six years until Kayla leaves for college." OH. MY. GOSH. As she sits in the kitchen now making a sign for her party tonight (7TH GRADERS, THIS WAY) I am hearing the same refrain in my head. How Did This Happen? How did our lives suddenly become stuck in fast forward?
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