THANK YOU FOR NOT SMOKING

So yesterday Paul and I decided to go out alone.

To Sam's Club for a few groceries.

Because we're romantic like that.

And I guess by saying "Paul and I..." I'm being a little deceitful, because actually I decided to go to Sam's club and convinced him to come with me so he could load the cases of water, Gatorade and green tea - that HIS children drink - into the van.

Anyway, after another romance-filled trip through Sam's club, we stopped by the library to pick up a book that was on hold for Paul. Actually, the book was on hold for Blake; but it was on hold under Paul's name, so our Top Level Library Security Team (the TLLST), would only let Paul pick it up.

I waited in the car, because the library was going to close in 10 minutes and I wouldn't have time to browse if I went in anyway. As I was waiting I saw a young man get out of his truck and enter the library with a couple of DVD's in his hand. Before he entered the door, he threw his nearly whole cigarette on the ground. I had two thoughts when I saw him do this.

First, he didn't step on it to put it out, and I thought if the grass was dry enough he could have started a fire and sent our nice little library up in flames. I intend to turn him into to Smoky the Bear once I have run his license plates through the system.

Second, since the cigarette was almost whole (is that the correct term - "a whole cigarette?") I thought how wasteful it was, to light one up, take a couple of puffs and then throw it away. I mean, aren't cigarettes like really expensive?

But I needn't have worried about the waste because when he came out of the library, he stopped, leaned down to the ground, picked up his still smoldering cigarette and put it in his mouth and proceeded to puff away at it, as he walked back to his truck.

I AM NOT KIDDING.

Now, obviously he didn't care about the toll the smoking was taking on his lungs, but what about the countless number of icky things that could have ended up on that cigarette while it was on the ground in front of a public library?

What was he thinking?

So I'm just going to take this opportunity to plead with you, my ones of readers, to stop smoking. If you don't smoke but know somebody who does, try to get them to stop.

Because lung cancer or any lung disease is not a pleasant way to die.

My dad quit smoking about five years ago. Less than two years ago, he was diagnosed with lung cancer. He died two months ago, tomorrow.

He did not slip away quietly as he slept. He died a frightening, horrible death.

His cancer had spread to his bronchial tubes and it was those tumors that the chemo and radiation could not shrink. But the treatments, of course took their toll. For some of his radiation, they actually had to insert a tube down his throat and deliver tiny pellets of radiation into his bronchial tubes. His voice faded and he could no longer speak loudly. He had to gasp for breath between words.

Ironically, it was not the tumors on his bronchial tubes that eventually caused his death. It was the the tumors in his lungs, that were breaking away from the lung walls. As the tumors broke away, he bled.

Profusely.

He did not cough up little spots of blood. He, in his own words, sprayed "sheets of blood" with each cough, and could not stop coughing, when an episode hit.

He had about four of these episodes, over the last ten days of his life. The first episode brought his children rushing to the hospital late at night because we were told he had hours left to live, he was in organ failure, and needed 3 units of blood to rebound. But he did, indeed rebound.

The final episode is what took his life. I was not there for that, which will forever by a huge regret, but by the way it was told to me, he basically drowned in his own blood. The coughing and bleeding started and was worse than ever. He was not able to control it, even by turning up his oxygen and taking all the other measures he had learned to control the situation.

He bled to death, and that bleeding filled his lungs.

And I'm sure he knew what was happening. I'm sure he knew his life was ending. I'm sure he knew that this episode would not be controlled like the ones before it.

I desperately want to tell all the smokers I know, especially those who have small children to STOP! IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY, STOP SMOKING! Even if you think this won't happen to you, why in the world would you want to gamble with your life like that? Why in the world would you want your loved ones to see you sick and suffering?

We are living in an age where there is no excuse to be uninformed. Warnings are everywhere about the dangers of smoking. I know it is a terribly difficult habit to break, but try. Please try to stop. There is no reason to believe that if you stop now, you can't have a very long and healthy life. Don't assume that because cancer takes some lives even after they've stopped, that it will take yours too. Don't assume that stopping won't matter in the end. Give yourself a chance.

This concludes this public service announcement.