DAY TWO - PART TWO - LONDON - JULY 25

After browsing in the local shops for a while, I looked across the street and saw my heart standing there:

Hey kids!

Then we came upon this little courtyard that was apparently all about art and self expression. I thought this camera looked really neat so I said "Hey Kayla let's see if that camera actually has pictures in it. What cool modern art."

Big mistake. Because I looked into that big lens there and BWING! my eyes popped out of my head. Oh dear! I had just invited my 15 year old daughter to view a little film that should have been rated NC 17 at the very least.

Well, I never! What kind of place is this?

Looking around, I got a little bit of an idea when I saw this:I think I may have burned my retinas. I skedaddled right out of there with my young daughter. But not, of course, before taking a picture for the blog.

There is no price I will not pay for this blog, you know.

(I wonder if the preacher is reading THIS entry.)

I like to call this shot: PRECIOUS...UNIVERSAL.

Because, really, is there anything sweeter than baby feet?



This courtyard was full of buildings like The Royal Society of Chemistry, The Royal Society of Art, The Royal Society of Accountancy. Blake was royally impressed by all of it.

We decided to go into the Sherlock Holmes Museum which was especially exciting because none of us has ever read a Sherlock Holmes Mystery. It was at this museum that Kayla met a couple of British Guys that just might have some potential. It was hard for her to decide which one she liked more because one was schizophrenic:

While the other was just slightly psychotic:

Blake was a little concerned when he read this proclamation: THE RED HEADED LEAGUE IS DISBANDED.

We had no idea what it meant but I think he slept with one eye open that night.

We decided to carry fast food back to the flat and have an easy dinner. So- God Bless America:

We found a McDonald's. Yes, the Big Mac was mine. But please know I only ordered it to compare a British Big Mac to an American Big Mac. Really. I only ate it for scientific research purposes. And boy was it the most delicious research I've ever done.

The next day was to be museum day - the best decision we made on our trip and the worst decision we made on our trip...

DAY TWO - LONDON - JULY 25

I certainly never thought that my family and I would one day enter a black cab in London and say to the driver "Buckingham Palace, please."

But that's exactly what we did on the second day of our trip.

Paul and Blake had gone running that morning and had brought back pastries from a local shop and - God Bless America - a couple of cups of coffee from Starbucks. We got to start our day leisurely which is always a plus. I got to start my day with a European pastry and a White Chocolate Mocha, which is also always a plus.

We arrived at the palace about 45 minutes before the changing of the guard, giving us plenty of time to get a spot right up by the gate. We then settled in to watch the crowd grow.

And grow and grow and grow.

It struck me as I was looking through the gates that there I was staring at Buckingham Palace and I had not yet even seen our own White House back home.

Note to self: plan trip to D.C.

There were, of course, many many children there waiting to see the "show" and we happened to meet a little girl named Billie. Billie was six and her baby brother Ernest (Ernie) was about 1. Billie and her parents lived outside of the city and she kept telling her parents that she was ready to go do something more fun, to which they would respond something like "Mummy and Daddy have chosen to do this now..."

Finally Billie folded her arms, furrowed her brow and announced "Well, I choose to go to the park. I DON'T WANT TO SEE THE QUEEN."

And I thought that was the funniest thing I'd heard in a while.

I couldn't help but wonder, while watching the ceremony, if there was symbolic meaning to everything the guards did. I was wishing we had a little guide to tell me, but it really didn't matter because....um yeah...WE'RE AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE and I should just stop over thinking things and enjoy myself.

So I did.

Interestingly, the W girls felt right at home in front of the palace...

And Blake seemed to feel right at home with the guards.

After Buckingham Palace we strolled through a beautiful park and came upon St. James Palace. Those pictures will be posted later because we actually ended up returning the next day so we could get photos with the guards.

Then we decided to pop into a few of the local shops.

We walked into a cigar shop because...well, I'm not sure why, but it actually smelled really good. The tobacco smell reminded me of my grandpa.

And really there's nothing I enjoy more than a good cigar and a glass of brandy after dinner..

Paul asked the lady behind the counter "Do you have any cigars made from locally grown tobacco?" because Paul loves little pieces of useless information like that.

Well.

This lady pursed her lips and squinted her eyes. She looked at us as though she couldn't believe mere peasants such as ourselves could ever have...oh, I don't know...won a revolution.

And she said "WE. DON'T. GROW. TOBAHCO. IN. THIS. COUNTRY."

Which was hilarious because every jar of TOBAHCO and every box of cigars contained a sign that said: SMOKING KILLS.

Yes our product will kill you, but rest assured we did not grow it here in THIS COUNTRY.

So we exited the store and I fell all over myself laughing. And then Kayla and I spent the day saying "We don't grow tobahco in this country."

Because we colonists are easily amused.

Luckily, before asking the tobacco question, we had asked the cigar people for a recommendation for lunch. We wanted a local pub because I was determined to eat fish and chips for lunch that day.

We ended up at a little pub called The Blue Post where I ordered Fish and Chips and - God Bless America - a Diet Pepsi. I was a little thrown off when I had to choose between Mushy Minted Peas (really) and Garden Peas to go with my fish and chips.

As curious as I was about the Mushy Minted Peas, I played it safe and ordered the plain Garden variety of peas.

Mushy Minted Peas? I wonder if I will ever regret not eating those. But I will say this. The English really can make some good fish and chips.

After lunch we walked to Piccadilly Circus where I bought a purse and had to inform my family that yes, as a matter of fact, I DID need another bag in my closet back home.

Three quarters of the W gang in front of some fountain in Piccadilly Circus.

Well would you look at this:

Less than 48 hours into the trip and I'm already on his last nerve.

Hmmm. Go figure!

THERE'S STILL TIME...

...to head on over to your nearest Dairy Queen and buy a blizzard.

Today.

Before they close. Go on now.

HURRY!!

In fact, why not buy a couple?

Because once again Dairy Queen will be donating a portion of all Blizzard Sales to
The Children's Miracle Network today.

Don't worry about the calories. For today only The National Organization of Calorie Counters (NOCC) has declared that Blizzards will be totally fat free, calorie free AND carb free.

So what will it be? Thin Mint? Oreo? Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?

All of the above?

Since my family is in Chicago for the day I will have to make the long lonely trek to Dairy Queen alone and partake of a Double Oreo Blizzard all by myself while watching trashy television and listening to the peace...I mean silence...in our home.

But I can do it.

For the children.

JUST WONDERING...

Over the last few days I have had no fewer than 4 (that's right FOUR) people ask when I would get a fresh vacation post up on this blog.

Fame brings tremendous pressure, people!

We have downloaded about 400 pictures from our trip and it is taking a while to decide which ones are blog worthy. Plus, I have to put into words all the thoughts that were so fresh and poignant in Europe but are now stale and moldy somewhere in my weary brain. PLUS, I'm having a little trouble getting the pictures to post on my blog.

So, I'm working on it.

In the mean time, I have a question for my ones of readers.

Say you have a dog that drinks out of the toilet. Say you know she's thirsty when you see her wandering from bathroom to bathroom looking for a toilet with the lid up. Say sometimes you are just lazy enough to actually lift the lid to the toilet rather than walk downstairs and actually fill her bowl with water.

Hypothetically speaking of course.

Well, say you decided to add little blue Ty-D Bowl cleansing pellets to your toilet tanks to keep the water fresh and sparkly and oh...I don't know....five days later, you realize your dog is drinking blue Ty-D Bowl water every time she finds an open toilet.

Do any of you think this would be harmful to this hypothetical dog?

I'm just wonderin'.

DAY ONE - LONDON - JULY 24

After an overnight flight from Chicago, we arrived in London at approximately 10:00 a.m. local time. We were met by a very nice man named Mike who zipped us through London traffic just quickly enough to make my eyes pop out of my head but not so recklessly that I let out a squeal.

At least I don't think I let out a squeal.

We arrived at what would be our home base throughout the trip - 52 Cadogan Square (pronounced kuh-DUH-gun).

That man in the window?

He's just some wacky, but sweet, American I picked up on the flight over.

But he was really handy to have around.

The flat has the grand distinction of being the only detached building on the block. As Mike pointed out, it is detached by approximately 2 inches.

I really felt special after hearing that.

Actually, the flat has a lot of great history. During World War II, the company moved their operations to this building because it was far enough out from the heart of London, they felt it would be safer from the bombing. The building was built by a printer who loved playing cards. He insisted his building be given the number "52" to honor his hobby. The panelling in the formal dining room has 52 large playing cards intricately carved into it, in honor of the owner's love of playing cards.

There were so many nooks and corners and little hide-aways in the building, and each area sported the ornate carvings. While Kayla and I explored the place on that first afternoon, we found this little balcony above the staircase and I insisted she go up there and perform for me.

Wonder if I'll see any hot British boys...

Alas, I cannot text whilst we are on our journey; for my mean father has forbidden me from doing so. It will be the dungeon for me should I be caught texting my dear friends...

After Kayla's little performance, I insisted Blake put on a puppet show but he did not go for that at all.


Looking out the window, I saw this little naked cherub.

Not only does the little guy need to find a toga; but a bath sure wouldn't hurt either.



This was the kids' room.

Those curtains? They were heavier than the comforter on my bed at home.




This was the sitting area of our room.

The bedroom situation was actually a mix-n-match kind of thing. The kids slept in the twin beds in the small room, while Paul and I got the master bedroom. However, the W boys used the small bedroom for their clothes and suitcases while the W girls used the master bedroom for clothes, suitcases, makeup, hair tools, shoes, jewelry and other necessities that we had to cart across the Atlantic ocean.

We had one nice sized bathroom but I didn't post a picture of it because this is a classy blog. To my knowledge, none of us used the bidet.

I think we were a little frightened of it.



This was the little nook in the living room.

I spent a lot of time looking out this window, watching the people on the busy street below and enjoying the tennis games that were going on in the park across the street.

In the living room we had the computer set up and the kids spent a little time each evening keeping in touch with their friends back home. Each morning, as we got ready to leave, we were able to watch Friends on television.

This is the lobby of the flat.

Our rooms were up those stairs.

Please excuse the illogical sequence of these photos. I have no excuse for it at all.

This is the dining room. This is the first room we entered when coming into the flat. This is where we ate if we carried food in or cooked in the kitchen. This is also where Paul settled in each evening to sort receipts, an activity he actually considers fun.

The doorway leads to the small kitchen which was just right for us to make breakfast and light lunches. Notice the sidebar stocked with drinks. Each time we left over night, the wonderful ladies would restock our drinks and ice before we returned.

Those poor women. My kids can drink lots of Coca-Cola; and I myself quite enjoyed the Schweppes Genuine Lemonade which was like Sprite only better.

As I mentioned before, I spent the first half hour upon arrival, wandering from room to room saying "Kids, aren't we the luckiest family alive?"

It is clear that Blake was thoroughly impressed with the charm and beauty of our home away from home.

Calm down, Blake!!

Kayla settled right in to a perfect reading spot.

After we had all taken showers and napped for a few hours, we set out in search of food.

The obvious place to look, of course, was Harrod's, which is actually a small city.

We settled on this cute little lunch counter in Harrod's food shop. It was right by the fresh meat counter where we could have bought some wild boar steaks or some fresh pigeon. But darn, we didn't have a grill back at the flat.

Paul and I shared a turkey sandwich with cranberry relish. Kayla had an American franfurter, and Blake had a bagel with cream cheese and lox. As we finished our meal, the very proper counter man handed us each a warm cloth that had been soaked in lemon water.

Now, because I had seen this in Ladies Home Journal I knew just what to do with my warm wash cloth. Poor, Blake simply held it out to us and pleaded with his eyes:

Um...say what...?

Just wipe your face, Son, it's refreshing.

And I decided right then and there that I'm going start having warm lemon water cloths after each meal.

No really, I am.

I'm going to clear away the pizza boxes, toss out the paper cups and pass out my fancy lemon face cloths.

After Harrod's we stopped in at a little grocery shop and bought a few supplies for our kitchenette and walked back to the flat.

After that, I have no idea what we did until we woke up the next day and headed to Buckingham Palace.

FAVORITE

A few of my favorite sights from our glorious vacation:


My girl on top of a double decker bus touring London.


My boy in the back garden at our friends' house - Shenfield, England.

My Love at our hotel in Bayeux, France:

Our families - Shenfield.

Lots of photos to sort, lots of thoughts to organize. More later.

PLANES, TRAINS AND AUTOMOBILES....A BIG BOAT AND A TWO-STORY BUS

As we near the end of our trip, I will post a quick recap of our travels so far - and a look ahead at where we will be the next few days before heading home.

This, I guess, is the prologue to my endless posts of our trip-of-a-lifetime vacation to England and France.

On Thursday, July 23, we drove 45 minutes to a regional airport where we boarded a puddle jumper for a 37-minute flight to Chicago, where we settled in for a three-hour layover.

Blake, 5 days from turning eighteen years old, walked off the plane and said "see ya' at the boarding gate in three hours." It's amazing how quickly he was able to ditch us and we hadn't even left our home state yet, not to mention the country.

We boarded our flight at about eight that evening - the first overseas flight for the kids and me.

After eight(ish) hours folded into a shoebox in coach, I began to have a greater appreciation for my husband and the many trips he takes overseas for business each year. Sometimes he gets to fly business class but sometimes he flies coach with the common people.

It's not fun.

Thanks, Honey.

After being picked up at the airport by a driver that often works for my husband's company, my adrenaline started flowing again because, HELLO, I was in London traffic.

Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas any more.

Upon arriving at the company flat, my sympathy for Paul's frequent and exhausting trips was starting to lessen. Pictures will come later, but we are fortunate enough to be staying in one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen. The building was built in the middle 1800's and has many ornate features that were so popular for that era. And it only took me two days to learn how to flush the toilet.

I kept wandering from room to room saying "Kids, aren't we the luckiest family in the world?"

Then I crawled into a big English bed and became comatose for three hours.

On Monday July 27, we boarded a train for a 90 minute ride to Portsmouth, England, where we spent the night so we could catch a three-hour ferry ride to Cherbourg France the next morning, Blake's eighteenth birthday.

I turned eighteen today and all I got was a lousy trip to Europe.

In Cherbourg we rented a car and Paul, with Blake as navigator, drove about an hour to Bayeux, a charming little French town in the region of Normandy, where we were fortunate AGAIN to stay in a lovely historic hotel.

"Kids, aren't we the luckiest family in the world?"

The next morning we were met by a lovely young French woman named Naomi who was our tour guide for the beaches of Normandy and the American Cemetery.

Next to giving birth to my children, it was the most moving experience in my life.

As Kayla and I put our feet in the waves of Omaha beach and I realized that my grandfather's boots had touched that sand, I thought once again that I was the luckiest woman alive to be able to be on this most revered piece of land.

And might I add? It was so heartwarming to see an American flag at almost every turn. These people have not forgotten.

After our tour, we had a few hours to pass back in Bayeux before driving back to Cherbourg. No vacation is without it's moments of hilarity and ours, thus far, have come as we wandered around Cherbourg listening to the GPS say, over and over again "recalculating..." We were lost for an hour. We could see the ships in the channel; we just couldn't get there.

We finally made it to the ferry port where we boarded the boat for our return trip across the English channel. Then we caught another train back to London, and a taxi to the apartment.

How do you say Exhausted in British?

This morning, we boarded a double decker bus for a tour of London. AN ALL DAY TOUR OF LONDON. We would have to live here for a year to see all the sights and take in all the history.

Tomorrow we will board another train and head to the town of Shenfield to visit our dear friends who lived in America for two years. We will celebrate Blake's eighteenth birthday with them, and hopefully have a couple of quiet days to visit before returning to London on Sunday to pack and get ready for an early morning flight home on Monday morning.

If you are not up to a blog version of boring vacation slides, I advise you to ignore me for the next couple of weeks. This is for my children and I intend to record every moment that I can remember because, even though they've done their share of eye-rolling over here, I insist they will want these memories recorded one day so they will remember how we were so gifted at embarrassing them that we were able to do it in two foreign countries.

Plus, right now I feel like we are the luckiest family in the world.

TACKY

Recently, at a softball game, a bleacher neighbor said to his wife "Hey did you hear? Heidi's family is going to London...virtually free."

"Virtually" is the key word here.

Since we are leaving on our "virtually free" trip soon, it only stands to reason that we had to replace our garage door and pay 325 dollars for van repairs last week. Neither of which was free - virtually or otherwise.

It also stands to reason that Paul and I are starting to receive strict instructions from our offspring on how we are expected to behave on this trip.

"I don't want to look like a bunch of tacky tourists," Kayla keeps reminding us, with a stern look in her eye.

What she's really saying is "You BETTER not embarrass me over there."

I say she's survived extreme embarrassment at our hands countless times on American soil; it's time to toughen her up and start embarrassing her on another continent.

After all, we want her to be well rounded.

Plus, it's like she's laying down a challenge for us.

Our number one rule is not to walk around with our cameras hanging from our neck.

I also don't think she likes my Easy Spirit Walk/Run shoes that I plan to wear much of the time.

(I think I'll pair them with Bermudas and red crew socks.)

Paul is not to drool over the maps of the subway routes like he did in Boston. Paul really likes maps.

He is not, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, to pick up a British accent, as he is prone to do after spending any time with a British co-worker.

I also think wearing dark socks with his white running shoes is a no-no; as is wearing white socks with brown dress shoes and plaid shorts.

Oh! and he is not to ask for Ranch dressing at every restaurant regardless of whether or not he has a salad.

I'm sure we will receive more intense instructions on the flight over, with the pressure building as we get close to landing.



Say it again. What are you forbidden to do? REPEAT!

I don't know! I don't know! Stop! Stop! I can't stand it another minute!!

So here is my promise to our sweet daughter:

I promise to embarrass you no more and no less in England than I ever do in America.

Take that how you will.

MY GIRL

Softball tournament.

Seven games in six days.
Three games on the final day.
After working their way out of the losers' bracket, they managed to place second out of 21 teams.


The trophy on the right is because they were the division champs. The middle sized trophy is for being runners up in the tournament. The smaller trophies and the medals are for enduring blowing rain, scorching heat, obscene language from opposing teams, excessive challenges from opposing coaches, overly competitive parents and, most importantly, for being told by the umpires that our team had exhibited the best sportsmanship of all 21 teams throughout the entire tournament.

Too bad there is no trophy for that.

Yeah, they got second place but WOW! These are some sweet girls and they are the best sports of the entire Country Girls Softball League.

The umpires said so. And the umps always get the final call.

Now this girl - my girl:

She pitched the whole tournament - minus half an inning. We estimate she pitched approximately 4o innings, give or take a strike or two. She managed to hit two triples in one game and a two run homer in the game against an arch enemy - I don't want to name any names - Meridian - but I am just shallow enough to say some victories are sweeter than others.

And then, 48 hours, two pizzas, a pool party, and a sleep over later...

Bippitiy Boppity Boo...

The fairy godmother had appeared; the little mice had worked their magic; the sweat and dust of the ball diamond were forgotten and the princess was ready to re-emerge.




My girl.

HELPING HAND

I was recently reminded of this picture:

Please excuse the unfortunate purple outfit on Blake. He was two and his grandma bought it for him. But notice how the purple saw matches his clothes. It is the closest Blake has ever come to accessorizing.

Isn't it amazing how quickly we move from this:


The phase of "Daddy, can I help?"

To this: "Son, I need your help."

You blink your eyes and suddenly they can carry their weight,

Hold their own,

Reach higher than we expected.

Please excuse the unfortunate outfit on Blake. He's eighteen and there's not a thing I can do about it. But notice his marine haircut. He found a barber (a retired soldier) in town who would give him a "High & Tight." And he charged him a mere five dollars.

For that price I fully expect Paul to be sporting the High & Tight any day now.

SIDE BY SIDE

Some things will always be the same.
No amount of reasoning, no amount of questioning, will change them.
Like the digits of the number line on a first grader's desk.
Always the same.
No matter how you count, no matter how you do the math, the numbers are the same.
Each number has its neighbor - forever side by side.

You can move forward; you can move backward; you can even skip a step or two; but always there will be the one that is by its side forever.

Because nothing can move it.


May you always have a friend that is only a step away.

May you always simply look to one side and find your forever neighbor, your forever friend.

SOMEDAY I'M GOING TO MISS THIS

Blake is at Wisconsin Dells this week for wrestling camp.

Since we redecorated Kayla's room while she was at camp, I thought the least I could do for Blake was give his room a thorough cleaning while he's away. After all, he doesn't want a bedroom makeover.

"I'll be gone in less than a year," he keeps telling me as he twists the knife in my heart one more rotation. "Do it when I'm gone."

So then.

Today when I went into his room to put some laundry away, I was thinking I'd get started on that little clean up I had planned.





SWEET MERCY! What have I done?

I just....

um...

It's just that...

WOW!

In all fairness, I did have to do QUITE A BIT of cleaning before decorating Kayla's room.

Sorry, Kayla, but I gotta keep it real.

So I should not have been surprised. But MY STARS the food wrappers! The Mountain Dew Cans! The unidentifiable containers!!!

So here's what I did.

I quietly set his laundry on the bed, backed out of his room and shut the door.

Because I totally believe in running away from a challenge.

ON JON AND KATE

Yeah I used to watch their show.

And, yeah, I still occasionally turn to their show when The Closer goes to commercial.

But I was becoming more and more disgusted by the way Kate spoke to her husband, her children, and to anybody else with whom she came in contact, so I stopped tuning in. Plus, I was starting to feel quite guilty that I was seeing these children in moments that would cause them embarrassment later when they saw the episodes played back to them.

Now that Jon and Kate have announced their divorce, there seems to be a debate going on about whether the show must go on.

Because it would be absolutely terrible for a mother and father to have to actually, you know, go to work 40 hours a week (or more) to support their children and give them a normal, albeit less materialistic lifestyle.

You want to know what I think?

This show must stop.

Now.

Divorce is very hard on children.

It is very hard for children to show up at school and know that their classmates and teachers have heard the news around town - the news that their family is falling apart. Because no matter how common or uncommon divorce is; it's not easy when it's YOUR parents. It is very hard for children to get used to a new family arrangement and the new "normal" that comes with divorce. There are new schedules to adjust to - some days with Daddy, some days with Mommy. There are new signals to read - will mommy be mad if I'm happy to see Daddy? Will Daddy be mad if I talk to Mommy on the phone. Children of divorce have to learn to walk differently. They have to learn to tread lightly; especially when one or both parents is known to have a volatile temper.

Now these eight precious children; these children who have had their privacy stolen, these children who have had their most private and embarrassing moments televised for the world to see; these children now get to adjust to their parents' divorce while the world watches.

It's bad enough that their regrettable tantrums, their potty training, their trips to the dentist, have all been televised in the guise of "making memories;" but now their hearts have to be laid bare for the world to see so that Mommy and Daddy can continue a lifestyle to which they very quickly became accustomed - a lifestyle they've convinced themselves they deserve.

There are those who wonder how these eight children are to be raised without the money generated from the show.

I think they are to be raised the same way most large families support themselves - with hard work and sacrifice and with a knowledge that there are more important things in life than Gymboree, swimming pools, and custom play houses.

I think they are to be raised the same way my mother raised four kids alone; and the same way my great grandmother raised seven kids alone; or the way our friends are now raising seven kids in today's difficult economy; or the way our other friends are raising nine.

They should be raised with the knowledge that they will have everything they need, but not necessarily everything they want. The should be raised knowing that designer clothes and free trips will not turn you into a decent, productive member of society. They should be raised knowing that they may not have the best of everything but at least their most important moments in life - good and bad - are theirs and theirs alone and will never be seen on You Tube. After all, don't all of us, as adults, have moments where our own behavior has made us cringe? Isn't it hard enough to remember those moments while we are trying to sleep at night? Can you imagine if those moments, those moments where we showed the absolute worst of ourselves, were immortalized for the world to examine over and over again? Do these children, because of their young age, deserve less privacy, less respect for their dignity?

This is what the Gosselins have done to their children. This is what they continue to do by adopting this "Show Must Go On" attitude. They have invited the world in to view the circus that is now their children's lives.

I can't help but think that in ten or fifteen years, these eight children are going to look back at how their lives were played out in front of the world and they are going to simply say "Why didn't somebody help us?"

And that is my question. Why hasn't somebody helped them - "Somebody" being the executives at TLC? Why aren't the executives at TLC willing to close their own wallets and say "Send those poor children home. This show is over?"

Why aren't the sponsors that shower them with freebies willing to say "NO" when asked if their products can be splashed across our television screens in exchange for free advertising?

Why won't somebody help these children? Because, like the Gosselin parents, all of the adults in these children's lives only hear money.

And these poor children are evidently still able to bring in lots of money for everyone involved.

I just hope the children actually get some of that money - lots of it. They're going to need it to pay their therapists.

MY DAUGHTER IS UNBALANCED

My daughter has this issue. It's called Extreme Arm Disproportion Due to Pitching (EADDtP).

It's really rather embarrassing:

See? See how her right arm has some bulk and her left arm...well...doesn't?

People point and laugh at her all the time.

Not really. Only when she strikes the Popeye pose, which I really hope isn't often but we never know...


Kayla's cousin, Maddy, is visiting this weekend. Maddy's mom and I are first cousins and our birthdays are 11 days apart. Our daughters were born 3 weeks apart. Not that we planned that, but you know how those things happen.

Anyway, these poor girls are miserable when they're together. MISERABLE I tell you!

Number one rule about sunglasses: Never wear anything bigger than a hub cap.

They are spending the day at our small town festival and then I heard something said about the mall.

I just hope they can stand to be around each other the whole time.

FINAL TOUCH

I finally got Kayla's curtains put up in her bay window tonight.

I had been waffling about whether to go with red or white and then exactly how to hang them. My neighbor has white sheers in her daughter's room and I really liked that look; and, since I couldn't find a sheer that was the right shade of red, I completely stole my neighbor's idea and went with white sheers. She has forgiven me though.

Kayla had no opinion on the matter whatsoever.

This is what we came up with:

Kayla wanted the shorter length because she knew the cat would have too much fun with the floor length curtains. Smart girl. You can't see it in the photos, but the ribbon on the sheers is blinged out with jeweled flowers.

Because, really, can a girl have too much bling?

I think not.

This is her east wall - what you see when you first enter her room:


I'm thrilled with the black walls. I think they have a very crisp look next to the white trim. If I was very brave and had money for a new dining room set, I'd go with a black and white dining room. Well, and if I was crazy enough to let Blake and Cody paint for me again. But I digress.

This is her other black wall - the north wall - that forms a right angle with the wall pictured above:

Having two closets really helps to break up the black. You can't see it very well but her mirror has a red frame. All I can say is I've spray painted more things red and black over the last two weeks than I care to think about.

We are done with Kayla's room. DONE I tell you.

And have I told you how much I love Wal-Mart and Hobby Lobby?

STORM

This morning at 6:00 we were awakened by the tornado sirens. For the briefest of moments I considered staying in bed; thinking it would be less painful to be blown into the next county than to get up and go to the basement.

Then I remembered I had a child in the house whom I must save.

Yes, only one child. Blake is now a future Marine; he's on his own.

Not really. He spent the night at a friend's house.

Anyway, I staggered out of bed and went to Kayla's room.

Kaaaayla...let's go to the basement - tornado sirens.

Then I went to get the dog.

Now the dog's favorite place to hide during a storm is in our garage. We have a small set of steps leading up to our door that leads to the laundry room, and she likes to hide under those steps at the first rumble of thunder.

When she can't get to the garage, she will choose from a number of different hiding places in the house - our shower, the basement bathtub, under the bar in the kitchen. She used to hide under the bed but now she's too fat.

She's very sensitive about that.

But her new favorite hiding place is the cat's litter box in the corner of the laundry room. And no, she doesn't scoop it out before she settles into it. And no, she is not small enough to fit in a litter box. But she somehow manages to fold herself into an interesting origami shape and lie there and tremble.

That is how I found her this morning.

And I had to drag her by the collar through the kitchen and living room to get her to the basement. She's learning though. As soon as she saw the open basement door, she zipped down the stairs and headed straight for the bathroom.

Where she stood trembling like a leaf and staring at me.

Weeeelll, can you give an old girl a hand up please?

So since it was six a.m. and she's a "Senior Dog" with arthritis, I gave her a little nudge and plopped her 57 pound body into the bathtub.

Where she proceeded to tremble and drool through the rest of the severe storm.

Blake absolutely loves it when he opens his shower curtain and finds: a) the dog lying there asleep or b) the dog's foot prints and drool left behind from her traumatic storm experience.

Blake is going to be home any minute.

Surprise Son!! We had a tornado nearby. Did you hear the sirens? Cookie is just fine, thanks for asking.

Ahh! This is just one of the many things I'm sure Blake will miss while he's a boot camp.

HABIT

I've heard that if you do something for 21 days straight, it will become a habit.

This morning marked my 22nd day of exercising in my effort to make it a daily habit.

I think I may have habitualized myself. I was kind of expecting somebody to show up at my door step with a Certificate of Habit, but there has been no fanfare whatsoever.

Somebody asked if the 21 day rule applied to good habits as well as bad habits; so in an attempt to add a little scientific research to my quest for an exercise habit, I decided to smoke a cigarette after each session.

OH! You know I'm kidding.

Anyway.

I am walking away the pounds - or I hope to be walking away the pounds. I am doing two different versions of Leslie Sansone's Walk Away the Pounds DVD series. On Monday, Wednesday and Friday I go next door and do one version with my neighbor in her basement.

This not only counts as exercise but free therapy. I am sure I expend more calories on those days because I spend the entire 47 minutes talking.

Really, just ask my neighbor.

On the other four days of the week I either do another version of the Walk Away the Pounds, in my own basement, or I actually, well, walk...around our little town. Only once in the past 22 days have I "walked" for a mile. The other days have all been two or three miles.

*cue applause now*

I've lost six pounds but, more importantly I feel really good; and MOST importantly, I think I've conquered my insomnia. You people have no idea how good it feels to sleep all night.

One of my skirts felt a little loose the other day but strangely enough, so did my shoes. Yeah, my SHOES.

Well this is just GREAT!! I bust my tail exercising every day and the only places I'll probably lose any weight will be in my feet and my breasts.

But back to the habit. I get a little uptight if I do not have a clear plan each day as to when I will exercise. If one of the kids has friends over to watch television, I say "Okay, but I HAVE to exercise some time today."

Well how BADLY are you bleeding, Blake? Because I have 17 minutes left to exercise...and kick back, kick back, kick back....jeesh kids!!

As with many habits; I fear this one might soon require an intervention.

Lift those knees up....

SURPRISE!!

So Kayla got home from church camp today. She was really tired. I think she went to bed at 6:45.

This morning.

After all there was pizza to be eaten and silly Olympics to play.

I was really excited to have her see her new room.

This is what she found when she walked in:


She really wanted a black and white room with red accents. We bought this comforter six months ago. See that bed? It was my grandpa's. I slept in it when I would visit him as a little girl. It was in his spare room. It needs to be sand blasted and painted but I refuse to do that yet. Kayla understands. She's had that bed for a few years now and really likes it. That bench at the foot of her bed? We bought that at a men's clothing store when they were going out of business - TWENTY DOLLARS!! The cushions are simply chair pads from Wal-Mart - velcroed on to the bench.

Now this picture below - this is where it all happens - the makeup table. She got this for her 13th birthday. It's actually a bar from a patio furniture set with a swivel stool. We wanted something narrow to save space. Works well.

Kayla has always wanted a dress form in her room - a full size one. I guess you could call this full size if you are making custom fashions for a two year old.

I like this little vignette below. I love the ceramic Converse hi-top. Because that is so Kayla - a little bit of frill mixed with a little bit of Converse.

The art work? Scrap book paper from my stock, framed in recycled frames that I spray painted black.

Kayla really wanted black walls in this room. And I really thought that wasn't a good idea:

But it is only paint after all. It can be covered - WITH ABOUT FOURTEEN COATS OF HER NEXT COLOR CHOICE! But I went with it and I must say I really like the look. Two of the walls are black. This photo above is what you see when you first enter Kayla's room.

I was so excited to see her reaction that I hid in her room to wait for her to come home.

Obviously she hated it.

And I couldn't take any more pictures after this one.

Somebody was squeezing me a little too tightly.