getting there

I guess we're getting there. We are still exhausted from our emotional weekend. Our first and harshest punishment was to withdraw Blake form his wrestling team. His heart was broken but he just hung his head and nodded. He understood. BUT....
Last night the coaches called. They want to support us and they understand but would we consider letting him stay on the team so they can be part of Blake's healing and change of heart? I kind of suspected this would happen. Wrestling is an individual sport, so their offer has nothing to do with needing him to keep a winning team record or having enough boys to fill their roster. If this was basketball or baseball or football we'd say NO WAY. But these men were hurting with us and one of them said "I know it seems like the only way to punish is to take things away..." Well, that's true.
So we stayed up most of last night AGAIN and decided to let him return....with conditions.
He will miss half of the remaing meets.
He must make a statement to his team and ask their permission to return.
He must do some sort of community service. That's the hard one. I am going through the yellow pages to look over our options.
This on top of the material things we took away.
One coach said something that I must address tonight. He said Blake needs to be reminded of this every day. I DISAGREE. Perhaps I misunderstood what he meant. But I don't believe in throwing mistakes in somebody's face. The mistake is made, the consequences experienced, we move on and learn. Where would we be if God had not invented grace and mercy? Thank you, God, for not reminding me of my mistakes every day. Those reminders come from our own guilt and shame and difficulty forgiving ourselves. Things that can spiritually paralyze an adult - not to mention what they'll do to a child.
So, are we doing the right thing? We both worry we are looking weak by changing our minds. I stayed awake again last night wondering. Suddenly, though, my eyes popped open and I wondered if this was The Voice. My prayer had been for wisdom. Was this the answer? Were these coaches used to show us the better, more creative way to teach this lesson. We do seem to instantly list things that the kids will lose if they do wrong; but this way is keeping Blake active and accountable for his mistake and making him reach out to others. He's not going to be staying in his room being depressed. He's got 4 more adults and a team of wrestlers to whom he is accountable now. But then again.....
How do we know if the answer we think we've received is the answer we were meant to receive?
I pray now that Blake will recieve this mercy and do great things with it and prove he is worthy of our change of heart.

"I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful," declares the Lord. "I will not be angry forever. Only acknowledge your guilt...." Jeremiah 3:12-13

Please continue to pray for us.