I'D LIKE TO REGISTER A COMPLAINT

Let's talk about The Gift Registry, shall we?

The gift registry makes me nervous. Very nervous.

First off, I will admit that I have never registered for gifts. Never ever ever. When we were engaged it just wasn't something our families did. When we were having our first child, it wasn't even very common to see a baby gift registry. I don't think any of our friends did a baby gift registry either. I personally like the surprise of an unregistered shower. I definitely like shopping better for an unregistered gift. Perhaps that makes me a renegade. I'm also a little uncomfortable with The Gift Registry because the recipient knows how much you spent.

On the other hand, I know The Gift Registry is a very convenient thing. It allows the guest of honor to let people know what she wants and needs; and it makes it easy for the giver to be sure they are giving something that will be enjoyed and appreciated.

Anyway, yesterday I had to buy a bridal shower gift.

So I went to the bridal registry computer screen and risked a migraine because it was real blurry and flashy and the words kept blinking in and out. So things did not start out well.
But after I got the print out and headed to the housewares department, I said to myself "This can't take long. I'll buy something in my price range that's easy to wrap and be home in no time, eating my lean cuisine."

Yeah, right.

The sheet set was exactly in my price range. The bride wanted "Queen sized/Ivory," and wouldn't ya know? They only had "Queen sized/white." So I stood there debating whether to get her the white in the EXACT BRAND she had specified on her registry, or get her THE COLOR she wanted in a different brand.

See? If I had just heard by word of mouth "oh, the bride and groom need sheets - queen," I could have picked up a nice neutral set of queen sized sheets. But because of the registry, I felt I had to get THE EXACT ones she had picked out.

The pressure was increasing by the minute.

I moved on to the dishes and bake ware. I though I'd get her the "Oval Platter/white" but it didn't come in a box. Neither did the "Cake Plate/white." And I like things that come in neat boxes so I can wrap them easily.

Slight increase in pressure.

So I found the dishes she wanted which, like most dishes today are packed separately - four bowls in one box, four plates in one box, etc. Looking at the registry I guessed she was hoping for service for twelve. I noticed somebody had already bought 2 boxes of SMALL bowls, and she wanted three. But nobody had bought LARGE bowls yet, and she wanted three of those also. I could not calculate how to get her the quantity she wanted of one or both sizes of bowls, while still staying within my budget.

More pressure.

I could only afford TWO boxes of large bowls, so that's what I got, leaving one box for somebody else to buy. And now I feel guilty because I only bought two boxes of bowls, when she wanted three boxes of bowls. I feel like I'm giving an incomplete gift. And the bride is going to have to go out after the wedding and try to complete her set of dishes.

The pressure is very intense by now.

What if the store quits carrying them by then, and she doesn't have the same number of each piece? What if she ends up with four salad plates, eight dinner plates, 12 mugs, eight small bowls? What if she can never ever ever find the rest of her dishes to complete her set?

I will have played a part in creating kitchen chaos at the beginning of her marriage. And I'm not sure I can live with myself.

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An interesting side note. Several years ago, we were invited to a 25th wedding anniversary party. The couple had registered for gifts.

Have any of you ever heard of registering for gifts FOR AN ANNIVERSARY?

'Cause we thought it was kinda tacky.